Characters:

JD – 25-40. Long-haired, bearded bumpkin. He is kind, has an enthusiasm for life, and a genuine love for his fellow man. He is at times dim, but at the same time incredibly wise. (JD’s age is not as important as the tenderness of his heart.)

Mitchell – 25-35. A straight man type. Originally from Maine, he moved to West Virginia with his girlfriend for a job. He answered an ad to bunk with JD earlier in the year. While he has become accustomed to the lunacy of the Mohigan Arms, he is no less unnerved by it.

Marlene – 25-35. JD’s next door neighbor. She is a painter, a former meth addict and the owner of an incredibly quick temper. She has been attending anger management classes and is clean of drugs, but the pot is bound to boil.

Tommy – 25-40. Marlene’s former boyfriend. Tommy has been in prison for the kidnapping and resisting arrest episode in the first installment of the Fried Meat Trilogy. A hot head, a poet, a thug, and a romantic.

Flip – 65 to 80. The owner of the Mohigan Arms. He holds a black belt in folksy racism. Crotchety, grouchy, and suspicious of most, especially strangers. But every once in a while you might catch him revealing a soft spot for JD. Flip is especially alarmed by Chad’s presence because he’s got some less-than-legal stuff out in the shed. (See casting note below.)

Chad – 21-35. A friendly, clean cut stranger who rents a room for the night at the motel. He tells Mitchell he is travelling from Maine. They instantly bond through shared experience. He unintentionally sends JD into a tailspin by telling him that Jesus wasn’t born on December 25th. The rest of the gang are unsure if he might be a government agent here to bust JD on suspicion of terroristic acts.

2 or 3 Children – Ages 5-10. Darling carolers who play a sweet counterpoint to Flip’s sourness.

Casting Note: Role of Flip can be cast Female; change name to Bunny.

Setting: JD’s and Mitchell’s shabby room at The Mohigan Arms, a motel in the backwoods of Mineral County, West Virginia.

Performance Royalties for AMATEUR and EDUCATIONAL Groups, please fill out an application for your personalized quote.

Performance Royalties for PROFESSIONAL Theaters will be quoted as a box office percentage, with a minimum guarantee based on ticket prices and theater particulars. Please fill out an application for your personalized quote.

Authorized Materials must be purchased from Stage Rights as a part of your licensing agreement (see Materials).

Billing responsibilities, pertinent copyright information, and playwrights' biographies are available in the show rider that comes with your license agreement.

"…every bit as hilarious as the prequel…this is a laugh-a-minute play that never calms down…” –Stage Happenings

“…original brilliant comedy…Keith Stevenson, writer and lead actor, is one of the funniest writers in L.A. If this doesn’t become an acclaimed comedy series on Showtime or HBO, I’d be very surprised. It’s witty. It’s got a great cast, and it’s only an hour…perfect for television! Come on producers….now’s your chance!” –Hettie Lynne Hurtes, KPCC

Authorized Materials must be purchased from Stage Rights as a part of your licensing agreement. Your materials will be sent to you digitally by your Licensing Representative.

The Authorized Materials/Production Package for [Fried Meat Trilogy] A Fried Meat Christmas are all fulfilled digitally and consist of:

Acting Edition

Stage Manager Script

Director’s Script